Giving back

Life's lessons are never easy. One would think that as we grow older, we should be wiser. And through experience, we learn how to avoid making the same mistakes again. Yet the one thing i keep doing, is believing that if i did enough, i would be duly rewarded. That by putting others before me, they would also pay it forward and this world would be a less selfish place.

I'm not being bitter here. But in the past months, it has become so evident that it's me giving.. and giving even more... and the more i try, more is demanded. Appreciation is little and accusations aplenty. By trying to be objective... to be understanding... i lost myself again. A dear friend pointed out that most times, i already have the answers, yet i still ask questions to seek assurance. Perhaps it's time to remember who matters most.

Love after Love by Derek Walcott
The time will come
when, with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,
and say, sit here. Eat.

You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you
all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.

Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,
the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

It's the little things...

It was a small cosy corner just near the bar. It was small plates of tapas. It was a small gathering of 6. Even the cake was tiny. But it was the biggest thing anyone could've done for me. Save for a few friends whom i wished could've been there that nite, it was the most awesome celebration a girl could have.

Thank you ALL for being there with me...
... and an EXTRA BIG slobbery kiss to FQ for being crazy enough to make the cake for me!! *HUGS*

Pretty pleased.. with icing on top

I've been neglecting this space again. Not because i want to but there's just been too many things going on for me to sit and write a proper post. And probably, this will not be one either.

Since FQ moved back more than 3 months ago, i've been spending a lot of time catching up. Despite keeping in touch throughout the 10 odd years she's been away, there's nothing like having your best friend back here again.. just down the road. Literally! ;D So much has happened, so much has changed... yet at the same time, it seems as though so much still remains the same. I guess that's what friendship is all about.

And over the past month or so, we've been spending MORE time together than usual (if that's even possible since we already talk/see each other every day :P). Through our love for baking and by someone's request, we started making cupcakes. What started as a small ad hoc 'sale' here and there have somewhat grown into a little business. Within a short space of over a month, we are now getting a steady stream of weekly orders from various people.

It's hilarious when FQ's husband commented that all he hears every day from both of us is "cup.. cup.. cup cup... cup.. cup cupcup...". Hahaha... Even Csu has gotten excited over this venture and started helping us whenever she can. The camaderie over the time we spend measuring, baking, decorating, etc is really amazing. It's also encouraging to have support & good reviews from so many people. We're even starting to have orders for weddings. Woohoo!!

Pardon the pun.. but i think i can safely say that this is sugar... spice... and everything nice. ;)

Celebrate TODAY

My parents used to tell me that when i was a little girl, i loved birthdays. Because of that, my Mum would bake a cake every day just so everyone could sing 'Happy Birthday' and let me blow out the candles. The next day, i would want to do it all over again. ;P Mind you, i didn't want to eat the cake, i only wanted to cut it. Hehehe...

If you ask me now, i have vague recollections of those times. Back then, in my simplistic way, i suppose it's not so much of the cake but what it 'brought' - the celebratory mood... loved ones around me... the happy feelings.

Today, (unfortunately) most of us would decline the offer for cakes/desserts. Reasons = Too much sugar.. too much cream.. too many calories... etc. In many ways, i think we have become so caught up with these that we forget to take little moments to pamper ourselves and indulge a little. Ooh.. am i being a devil's advocate here? Hehehe...

Guess what i'm trying to say is.. don't forget to celebrate 'LIFE'. In the midst of whatever that's gloomy, remember the things that made you smile. And yes, go on.. have a cake if it makes you happy....


and forget the calories. (You can always work it off tomorrow... ;P)

Reflections

There were many times when i started a post only to see it getting more and more depressive. I could've posted it and probably start a chain of pessimistic ones thereafter. Instead, i chose to delete them. Or maybe, as a friend pointed out, perhaps i've already poured out my frustrations to friends in real life that there is no need to write them anymore. :)

Whatever it is, these past months have made me appreciate my friends even more than ever. So where i fail in gratitude, let me express it through this poem from Helen Steiner Rice.

~ ~ O ~ ~

My Thanks

People every in life
From every walk and station,
From every town and city
And every state and nation
Have given me so many things
Intangible and dear,
I couldn't begin to count them all
Or even make them clear
I only know I owe so much
To people every where
And when I put my thoughts in verse
It's just a way to share
The musings of a thankful heart,
A heart much like your own,
For nothing that I think or write
Is mine or mine alone
So if you found some beauty
In any word or line,
It's just "Your Soul's Reflection
in proximity with mine."

~ ~ O ~ ~