A little bubbly

It has always been a running joke among my friends that i am high-maintenance. Moi?!? High-maintenance?!? You must be joking. Hehehe...

So to prove that their point, they decided to take a quick calculation on what i was wearing/carrying the other day. Laptop + handbag + camera + ipod + clothes = enough to feed a family of 5 for a whole year. And with that, they concluded that no man will be able to 'afford' me. *groan*

Weiiiiiiii!!! That's not fair. I PAID for all those things myself.... with my own money. And those things were bought over a period of time. AND i eat 'chap fun' like everyone else. *ok Tsing, if u're reading this part, stop laughing.

Ok, so what if i indulge in my fav coffee once in a while or dine at a cafe instead of a roadside stall? Dayum.. someone just said this to me "You have an inclination to champagne but only earn enough to pay for dishwater".

Sheesh.... so fine.... both hv bubbles in them. Nothing wrong with preferring the sparkly right? *hic*

The driving factor

A while ago, i allowed someone else to take the wheel. Thinking that maybe.. just maybe... i can learn to 'sit back' and see a different view. But somehow, by allowing myself to 'trust without question', i found myself stranded by the wayside. To realize how far i've been steered off course. To think that THAT was the way i wanted to go when the roadsigns along the way pointed otherwise. And harder still to find my way back. How foolish i was to think there would be roses when all i got was thorns.

I am back on this road called 'life'. But instead of embracing it like a familiar friend, i have been beating myself up for taking a wrong turn. Trying hard to make up the 'lost time' , i charged full speed ahead. Everything else became a blur as i raced on at breakneck speed. Thinking that if i moved faster, everything will be rosy again.

And in doing so, i have (once again) lost sight of what's important. In my impatience, i have been frustrated when i don't see immediate results. I have forgotten that it's the journey, not so much the destination, that matters. That it's also the pit stops along the way that recharges me.

Now, i find myself running on empty. I'm not lost....but i don't know where i am also.

Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation

Caffeine is my shepherd; I shall not doze.
It maketh me to wake in green pastures:
It leadeth me beyond the sleeping masses.
It restoreth my buzz:
It leadeth me in the paths of consciousness for its name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of addiction,
I will fear no Equal™:
For thou art with me; thy cream and thy sugar they comfort me.
Thou preparest a carafe before me in the presence of The Starbucks:
Thou anointest my day with pep; my mug runneth over.
Surely richness and taste shall follow me all the days of my life:
And I will dwell in the House of Mochas forever.
~Author Unknown~

Friendly faces, familiar places

Took a couple days off work this week in lieu of Chinese New Year. Combined with the public holidays, i have 9 days to do absolutely nothing except eat, hibernate and grow 'prosperous'. Hahahaha...

Had the opportunity to meet up with some of my high school friends, one of whom i've not seen for about 15 years. Used to be very good friends with Shaan but since leaving school, with us moving states/countries, we just 'lost' each other till recently. :D So happy to have found each other again and had soooooo much to catch up on.

We also managed to meet up with some of the guys from our primary school. Gosh.. that was an even longer absence. 20 years!! Was a bit scary at first.. the thought of seeing them again after so long. Not that they've grown an extra nose or anything. But we weren't really close to them or for some, even 'in the same league'. So when we agreed to meet for coffee... Shaan & i kinda had a 'freaked ugly duckling syndrome moment'. :P

But it turned out well.... we laughed about the way we used to be, we talked about our present lives and before you knew it, hours had passed. Ice melted, coffee drunk and zero casualties. Not bad...not bad after all. ;D

A step at a time

Can't believe we're already 18 days into the new year. There were too many times when i started a post, only to abandon it because it became too depressing. 2007 hadn't been too good for me.. and i guess for a number of other people as well.

Things just came one after another. Just when you thought it couldn't get worse... it did. Disappointments, let-downs, broken promises, misunderstandings, betrayals.... it made me wonder if there was any integrity left in people.

Yet again, i say this... i am soooooooo fortunate to have good friends beside me. Csu has been very supportive of me. Even though she may not always understand what i'm going through, yet she tried. And i saw the true measure of friendship when i called Siryn & FQ in the middle of the night (after a heart-breaking incident) and burst into tears. I just lost it then but they were my pillars of strength. To assure me things are gonna be ok. Even Tsing (whom i've lost touch with for decades), when he heard about it, called and showed me concern which i never expected. These friends kept me company.... on the phone, online and via webcam throughout the night as i sobbed my heart out. :)

And i am so thankful that Siryn took the time to go Singapore with me over the New Year weekend. I didn't have to say it, but she knew i didn't want to be alone with my thoughts. Her presence made a whole lot of difference as we met up with friends and went shopping. And boy, did we SHOP!! One would think that our country is deprived of footwear from the number of shoes we bought from Charles & Keith. :P

FQ, Siryn & Csu have, through their friendship, assured me that i am never alone. And Tsing, in his blunt truthful way, has reminded me that i have not 'failed'. These friends have taught me to look at myself again and see the strength that lies within. The person who's spirit that isn't easily broken and who's not afraid to get up after a fall.

So.. with this new year.. here's looking to better things ahead. And since i'm going to step up and step out (once again), it doesn't hurt to do it with style... and with new shoes too!! ;D